1 in 8 women will suffer from Infertility. It is still a taboo subject but it shouldn’t be.
You will have heard of IVF and how there are massive cuts in the NHS which is destroying the hopes and dreams of heartbroken couples whose only choice is IVF to start a family.
I have heard and seen many comments made by people and the media regarding IVF that are negative and quite frankly rude. If you do not have personal experience of Infertility you do not have the right to comment in such a manner, that’s just my opinion.
From personal experience, having gone through 4 IUI and 2 IVF (ICSI) cycles, it is not the “easy” option.
To have undergone multiple tests, examinations and procedures to be told they don’t know why you can’t have children as everything looks perfect is not only frustrating but also very hard to cope with.
Then the months of injecting yourself with hormones to induce your body to enter a menopause state. To then pump it full if more hormones to grow upto 20 eggs in one go. That is not comfortable let me tell you. Removal of the eggs is by a large syringe into your ovaries – Ouch!
Waiting to hear how if your little eggs have fertilised, if they are growing well and if you will get the chance to have them put back inside your womb. That is a very frightening time.
And just like that with a quick procedure they are back inside you. This is no guarantee they will stay put and grow into a full term baby however. That wait to see what the outcome will be feels like years.
Both times our IVF cycles resulted in a pregnancy. We were very lucky in that respect. I have many friends that have been through far more cycles before they fell pregnant, some that are still yet to fall.
But as I said before, it is only the very beginning of a long journey. Sadly our first baby’s journey was short and we were left heartbroken and very lost.
None of the physical pain and discomfort comes close to the agony experienced over the four years of yearning for a child. Being unable to fall pregnant like all your friends, relatives, strangers and celebrities. To feel physical pain in your heart at every pregnancy announcement. Suffering in silence. To fall pregnant, to lose your miracle baby.
We are beyond blessed that our second IVF worked and I carried our beautiful twins to full term. Not everyone is as lucky.
If you know someone affected by Infertility, be kind, ask how they are, be supportive, don’t exclude them from anything child/baby related and most importantly be there to listen. You may not understand but you can be there for them.
Whatever you do don’t say any of the following “just relax”, “you can always try again”, “my friends brothers wife’s cousin did IVF so I know what you are feeling”
I am 1 in 8.
I have met some of my closest friends through my journey to motherhood. For that I am eternally grateful. You girls know who you are.
I hope by sharing my story it will help others in my position to feel hope. “Sometimes miracles take a little time”