After talking to a good friend of mine, a fellow SEN mum it dawned on me how I had been in the “in between” all this time. No wonder I felt so isolated. Our “in between” consists of living life as a Mum to an ordinary child and a extraordinary child.
Where the groups designed for your ordinary child are not suitable for both children. Where you physically cannot participate fully due to your extraordinary child’s needs.
Where the groups designed for your extraordinary child are not suitable for both children. You are frowned upon and have to apologise for your ordinary child’s ordinary behaviours.
You just don’t fit in, in either setting. Which means not only are you excluded from normal groups but also the more specialised groups too.
I have never felt comfortable at any group. Both my children’s abilities are so vastly different but there are so many activities they both enjoy. Painting, water play, play doh, stories, music, the list goes on.
A place to belong, to socialise and to be welcomed is what we needed. Inclusion is not always about included those with SEND it can also sometimes be the other way round too.
From the unique viewpoint of a mother to twins, each so very different in needs, abilities, interests and personalities. I have seen how easy it is to fall into the “in between”. It’s not a nice place to be. My hope is that this will change in time as inclusion is improving.